On a Bench in Hungary, a Promise Leads to a Proposal

When Jessye Danielle Marquez met Thomas William Patrick Wood they were both rising juniors in high school and living an ocean apart. They met in July 2014 at the 14th World Eskrima Kali Arnis Federation World Championship in Debrecen, Hungary.

“I see Tom practicing his form kind of casually,” said Ms. Marquez, who was on the American team and dragged to the practice of Mr. Wood’s British team by her “bubbly friend Chelsea from Ireland.”

He did quick tricks and strikes with the traditional weapon of the Filipino martial arts form — a 25-inch eskrima stick, made of rattan, also known as an arnis or Kali stick.

“I was blown away,” Ms. Marquez said. Her friend quickly played matchmaker, and called Mr. Wood over.

The two, now both 26, barely spoke that day, but the next day, Ms. Marquez stood by his ring between fights.

“We went to the sidelines and started talking,” Ms. Marquez said, and soon she was asking him if he wanted to grab lunch.

Mr. Wood, who went to an all-boys school, was a bit nervous around girls. “I had fish and chips playing into the Britishness,” he said, with a laugh. “She had grilled ham and cheese.”

As they chatted they realized they had at least one thing in common, other than martial arts: New Jersey.

He mentioned that he lived in Short Hills, N.J., until his family moved back to the London area when he was four months old. Ms. Marquez, whose parents are from the Philippines, grew up in nearby Union, N.J.

“I quite fancy you,’” Ms. Marquez recalled him saying. She was quite elated and replied, “I like you too.”

On the second day of the tournament, a full contact sparring day, they were in each other’s corner.

“We’d give each other pep talks and water to hydrate,” she said. They could only drink with a straw while geared up in a padded helmet with a metal face cage.

Her father, who was strict when it came to boys, was the grandmaster of the event and busy officiating, but he made sure others kept an eye on her.

Each won gold medals in all three events: single stick full contact, double stick full contact and choreographed fight displays.

During the closing dinner banquet, they sat next to one another, where he later built up the courage to ask her to step outside with him.

“He was saying he really likes me and will miss me,” she said, and they kissed. Teammates, who had spotted them holding hands, cheered when they returned.

The next morning, the two slipped away from their hotels at 6 a.m. before catching flights home. On a bench in a little square by a church, they exchanged tearful goodbyes, kissed and committed to each other despite the distance.

They kept in touch on Skype, and two weeks after returning home, officially announced their relationship status on Facebook.

In February 2015, Ms. Marquez joined her mother and two aunts on a trip to London. Mr. Wood had carefully planned a tour of Central London for just the two of them on Valentine’s Day, followed by dinner at an Italian restaurant.

“I walked through all the locations with mum a week before,” he said. Ms. Marquez also visited his family in the London suburb Orpington.

When he visited the United States in April, her itinerary included the High Line park, Serendipity in Manhattan for warm brownies with ice cream, and, at his request, Walmart in New Jersey.

With college on the horizon in 2016 — he had always planned to go to one in the United States — they decided to keep their choices and decisions independent of each other, and a secret, until their big reveal over Skype in May.

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In unison, “We both say Rutgers,” she said, followed by joyful shouts. Shortly after they arrived on campus, they naturally joined the Filipino Martial Arts club.

She graduated from Rutgers with a bachelor’s degree in nursing and he, magna cum laude, with a bachelor’s degree in genetics.

Mr. Wood, who is now conducting research at the Columbia University Medical Center, is pursuing a doctorate in genetics and development at Columbia. He also received a master’s degree in genetics and development and a master of philosophy from Columbia.

In July 2021, Ms. Marquez, now a behavioral health nurse at Harlem Hospital in Manhattan, moved into his apartment near the medical center. A year later they adopted a gray and brown tabby cat, Miss Breezy.

Two years later, in July 2023, Mr. Wood planned a mystery trip to Europe, and proposed on the very bench in Debrecen where they had made their commitment to each other nine years earlier.

“Here on this bench I want to commit to you a second time,” he said, getting down on one knee.

On Feb. 23, the two married at the Palace at Somerset Park in Somerset, N.J. Douglas Elkerson, a Universal Life minister, and their coach on the Rutgers Filipino martial arts team, officiated before 163 guests.

At the reception, after the maid of honor handed the bride an eskrima stick, and the best man gave the groom another, their first dance, which began slowly, took off.

Guests cheered as they did freestyle tricks with eskrimas at warp speed, twirling them like batons, and ended with a kiss.

“This brought us together,” Ms. Marquez said, and “we wanted to share it with people we love.”